Experiences of Meeting would be partners

Marriage is most important phase of our life. To whom we rely in this age of marriage apps for guidance? May be this community can help...
arpit
Posts: 9
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:50 pm

Experiences of Meeting would be partners

Post by arpit » Sat Aug 11, 2018 4:12 pm

Hi

We all must have met our would be partners through matrimonial sites. For me, sometimes it has been really amazing to sometimes shocking. While I have my own experiences, me and my cousin often share these experiences and enjoy a lot :lol: :lol: . I just thought why not share these experiences here. I will share a few of mine. In case you also like it and wish to share, you are welcome... :P :P

arpit
Posts: 9
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:50 pm

Re: Experiences of Meeting would be partners

Post by arpit » Sat Aug 11, 2018 4:21 pm

This is my one funny experience.

I got a message on Facebook from a random girl of matrimony site.

She literally checked all my Facebook photo albums. And asked me to remove all pics of mine which I clicked with my female friends. She didn’t even request me to remove those photos, it was a direct order from her side in our first conversation. And reason she said that, her parent are simple minded people and they will not accept such behavior from son-in-law. :shock: :shock: :shock:

Then she asked me about my past relationship. And I genuinely told her that I really wanted to marry my ex but her parents didn’t allow us due to caste issue (Open Vs. OBC). My ex wasn’t ready to leave her parents as they emotionally blackmailed her. So we BOTH mutually decided to move on in life as there wasn’t any positive results.

But that girl said- “I’m not a cheap girl, so never had any past relationships in my life. And if you can left your ex then there are chances that you may leave me in future.” :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

She didn’t even think that we took that sad decision for the sake of my ex’s family’s happiness.
Last edited by arpit on Sat Aug 11, 2018 4:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

arpit
Posts: 9
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:50 pm

Re: Experiences of Meeting would be partners

Post by arpit » Sat Aug 11, 2018 4:24 pm

And this is my second interesting experience

I found one girl’s profile on matrimony site. She was really beautiful. Below are her few basic details:
- Education: masters of computer application, Pune University.
- City- Pune.
- Family status- Middle class.
- Caste- OBC

And below are things which she expected-
- Fair and handsome groom with good height and build.
- One who studied MS in US and settled in US itself.
- Who’s earning atleast $ 80,000 (Approx. Rs. 52 lacks ).
- Family status- Upper middle class and above
- Caste: OBC and Open categories only.

And she has written a note in her profile that- “person who satisfies above criteria should only send a message/request.” :roll: :roll:

Few days back I came to know that she’s working in my organization only and she’s earning approx. 5 lacks.

Funny thing is that she was expecting a guy who’s earning 10 times extra than her salary. :lol: :lol: :lol:

seema
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:55 pm

Re: Experiences of Meeting would be partners

Post by seema » Wed Aug 15, 2018 1:18 pm

I also have an interesting incident to tell.

The guy was 8 years elder than me and was working as an officer with a reputed government organization in Gurgaon. So this guy called me in the evening, I was still in office working for a major release in a IT company. Conversation started like this :

He : Hi are you Seema?

Me : Yes, may I know who’s speaking?

He : I am Mr.XXX working as a XYZ officer in ABC government organization. Your mother already have told you about me and my profile.

Me : (I am a bit hesitant person… so was actually thinking what to say next….) Yeah she told me a bit about your profile.

He : So before starting our conversation I will ask you a very clear question, do you have any boyfriend?
:roll: :roll: :roll:

Me : (I was shocked…I mean literally shocked…I was expecting he will ask me whether it is the right time to talk or not because I was literally busy that time and instead he was asking me this … urgggghhhhhh!!!…but okay I kept my calm and went to the separate room to talk) I am sorry, what kind of question is this?

He : No I just asked because I never had any girl friend. Though I am open minded person but I will prefer a girl who has no past. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Me : (I mean really…are we having this conversation ??..again kept my calm and answered politely) No I don’t have a boyfriend.

He : Well then we can take our conversation ahead. I like your profile on the site and spoken to your mom already. I have two houses in so and so places. I have recently purchased a flat in Gurgaon, I have a white bullet, I have a SUV car. Anything else you want to ask ? :roll: :roll: :roll:

Me : (Woahh!!!!!!! So is he bribing me with all that or what…honestly I was expecting him to tell about his personality, his family etc and he kept on telling me his assets or whatever) Okayyyy, that’s good for you. What about your family?

He : (Told about his parents and brother) My expectations from you is you should stay with me and my family even if it demands you to leave your job. You have to leave your current job as it is in Bangalore and I stay in Gurgaon(now Gurugram). I like eating home food so I am hoping that you know cooking. Actually you don’t need to do any job, I earn enough to manage well.

Me : Ok then, it was nice talking to you. I am in office right now and have to work for an important release. Good night tc.

Ended the conversation and asked my mom strictly to stop this for atleast some time.

Story doesn't end here. He called me next day late night and he was drunk.

He : What is the problem with you. Why are you not interested in me?
:evil: :evil: :evil:

Me : You are a good person and why will I have a problem with you? :lol: :lol:

He : Then tell your parents you want to marry me(He was very angry, I don't know why). :o :o :o

I was shocked again. I ended the conversation then by telling him that my career is very important for me. I will not be able to leave my job right now. I give my first preference to the family, so here I don't think that I will be doing justice with you.

anurag
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:52 pm

Re: Experiences of Meeting would be partners

Post by anurag » Wed Aug 15, 2018 3:09 pm

My experience has been a very memorable one

The formalities of seeing the girl started, my mother and Chachi gave flowers, fruits and sweets to the girl. Though I used to see Manjula daily, I was surprised to see her in a beautiful Mysore (Karnataka) pure silk saree. She was looking gorgeous with a mild and naughty smile with full of dreams for a beautiful life ahead. I was clean bowled, but was really worried whether she would agree, as we had a fight in the college.

My Chachi started the dialogue, Manjula, you know Manoj is very smart boy, he is an all rounder, he is first class throughout his career, artist, she further said “I know you had a fight in college with him, don't worry, he is a very soft guy in reality”, hearing these words, she was almost mocking and laughing looking at me. Face palm. :oops: :oops: :oops:

Chachi continued, he is good in wrestling (my grandfather was a wrestler), hearing this my father interrupted and said, you know he was runner up in college wrestling championships, looking at me he continued, there were only two participants. Everyone started laughing.

Another big embarrassment, I was wondering whether I have gone to see the girl or all have come to see me & interview me. :cry: :cry: :cry:

My father was very popular and good physics professor, he was very strict and serious in college, but in a group he was very witty. My father started talking to her, he asked whether she likes movies, she said once in a month she watches movies. He continued, no no if at all you get married to Manoj , you have to change your habit (she was thinking that she has to stop watching movies), she was puzzled and looked at my father, he said don't worry, Manoj watches 3–4 movies a week (as I was not given much work in office, I used to watch almost all movies) double face palm! :twisted: :twisted:

Manjula served sweets, snacks and asked us whether we like to have tea or coffee, my father said tea without sugar (he was a diabetic), Chacha and Chachi said even they want sugarless tea (in U.K. they drank sugarless) as I was used to drinking sugarless tea with my father I said same thing for me. Hearing this Manjula’s father asked “are you all family diabetic? Another face palm!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

I was totally depressed, Manjula was looking cheerful. Another big embarrassment was waiting for me, as we came out of their house, my nephew was peeing on their compound wall and was making designs with his pee. ;) ;) ;)

It was Day of fun and full of embarrassments, but that was my turning point in life. We married on 20th May 1982. Happily married for 35 years
Life moves with all such sweet memories, ಸವಿನೆನಪುಗಳು ಬೇಕು ಸವಿಯಲು ಬದುಕು (Savi nenapugalu beku Saviyalu Baduku) we need sweet memories to cherish the life.

Kannada meanings;

savinenapugalu-sweet memories, beku- requires, saviyalu- to taste or enjoy, baduku- life

shobha
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:58 pm

Re: Experiences of Meeting would be partners

Post by shobha » Wed Aug 15, 2018 5:40 pm

I have met many guys now and I have kind of become a pro in taking people's shit for my parents' "pride".

I met this guy early this month.Dad shared my number with his parents and wanted him to call me.The moment he called, he said he wasn't too comfortable talking over the phone. I felt happy because I believe the start has to be one on one face to face.Moreover, I can't bear anyone over the phone for a second over 10 minutes. So, I thought maybe, maybe this is the guy...

We had agreed upon meeting up one day after we spoke on the brief 1 minute call. I had informed him that I will be coming straight to the venue of his choice from work. It was 5'o clock in the evening that day and there was no sign of him picking up the place and calling me up.I had to travel to another city the next day for a dear friend's wedding and my return was planned only 10 days later. My anxious parents wanted to know the decision that very day ! (How can a girl who is refrained from talking to guys suddenly is ready to go to bed with a stranger one night is still a puzzle for me !) :? :?

So, I decided to call him.He hadn't chosen the meeting place. I had to go back to work since I had to wrap all my work before I went on the long vacation. So, I decided to meet up at a nearby coffee shop.He didn't know the directions. So I sent Google map link to him on WhatsAapp. :x :x

Personally, I would be impressed if I got a Google map link to direct me. This guy didn't understand and then I had to explain him in detail how he was supposed to reach there. He lived 20 minutes away from the coffee shop. :x :x

Finally, we met and went inside the coffee shop.The moment we placed the order, the first question he asks me is "Are you a career-oriented female?" I was completely shocked. :shock: :shock: :shock:

What was this question supposed to mean? Why did I work my ass off all these years to earn a double Masters Degree ??! To not be thinking about building a career? I politely said, yes. To this he said, OK, so I don't want such a girl ! I didn't know how to react! I was thinking, maybe this guy didn't like my face or my figure or my height or my color! I wanted to slap him for saying that since he already knew I was a working female.He could have called it off the first time we spoke. We never had to meet up. I wanted to barge out of the coffee shop. But my father's face flashed in front of me and I controlled myself. :x :x :x

Then he went on to tell me everything about him.He was working in some Oil and Gas company. Kept bragging about his degree, Doctorate and how it was a fluke.He also boasted about how he wanted to be a model and his parents didn't allow. How he had bagged several modeling assignments and turned them down. I know things about him that I don't give a shit about. Today, if you would ask him my name,he wouldn't know. He wouldn't know where I work.

I hadn't touched my drink.Exactly one hour later, I gathered the courage to tell him that we had heard enough of him and that I had to leave.He insisted on driving me to my work place, but I turned his offer down. I don't remember how many hours I cried that night.I was inconsolable. I happen to be a smart person at work, have been smart at school and college too. I have no words to describe how I feel when I meet such chauvinistic guys. I want to retaliate, but I can't. I wish someday I meet someone real nice :( :( :(

nalin
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:35 pm

Re: Experiences of Meeting would be partners

Post by nalin » Thu Aug 16, 2018 8:29 am

OMG these experiences are really eye opening. I will share few of mine experiences also

I am a 27 year old guy from a brahmin family, brought up in bangalore. A BE +MBA graduate from a premier national institute. Soon after I completed my MBA and landed in bangalore about two years back, my parents started looking out for brides since they felt there was too much demand in the market and that there was no point in waiting :lol: :lol:

Sometime in September 2012 , I met this girl who was very pretty. Even though she didn't meet my expectations in some ways, I was really attracted (men, will be men :lol: :lol: ) and decided to take it up further after the first short meet at my house. Even the girl reciprocated positively and we met again. After a brief meet at a coffee house, i took her on a stroll to a nearby park on a beautiful rainy evening !

She started talking about her job ( IT Engineer) and i jumped the wagon and told her how i appreciate her career-mindedness and started talking about women empowerment and all < yea even before RaGa started :lol: :lol: )

Finally we decide to get back home and while leaving in a cold voice she says, dude "i really don't want to work after marriage and want my husband to take care of me. I really don't think this relationship will work" . I stood there like a dunce as she walked away on that beautiful rainy evening! :roll: :roll: :roll:

Lesson learnt :Shut your mouth till the girls finish their point :lol: :lol: :lol:

More to follow in next post.
Last edited by nalin on Thu Aug 16, 2018 8:36 am, edited 1 time in total.

nalin
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:35 pm

Re: Experiences of Meeting would be partners

Post by nalin » Thu Aug 16, 2018 8:35 am

A second one I want to share.

It is a quite a recent one , girls family is friends of our close relatives . The girl was well educated and average looking . Automatically family starts putting a lot of pressure to say yes even before the meet, We meet first at a CCD , talk for around couple of hours , the girl is a chatterbox which influenced the attractiveness ( not just looks !) :) :) .

I come back home , she indicated a positive decision at her place and we get a call from her place. I clearly tell that i need at least one more meeting to decide upon . We meet the next day in a different CCD and talk it out . Finally i thought i can say yes to her . I did it in my own dramatic way and she looked smitten and happy . :D :D

Chatting follow for the next week and they come down to our place for talks on wedding dates . We meet once again on a sunday evening and i take her around beautiful locales in south . She holds my hands and seems very happy . However later in the night call she tells that once she loved someone a lot who died 8 years ago in a accident. I was like ok , it doesnt matter . She started talking again like a chatterbox. :) :) :)

A day after that her parents call up and say that she is having second thoughts about alliance . I was like WTF . I had just talked to her yesterday night at 8 30 and she seemed normal . However at 10 PM she told she is busy and cannot chat . The next day this call from her parents really schocked us. However she calls and tells that she has higher expectations, the guy needs to be forthcoming and all. When i asked about the n number of times she confessed that she liked me a lot. She said , yes i did like u at that time, but not now :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: .

I mean WTF such a drastic change in 16 hours , rather in 1.5 hours . :shock: :shock: :shock:

After some argueing, I decide to hang up the call, feeling backstabbed ! :evil: :evil:

its been a very excruciating experience , the arranged marraige process for the past two years. Sometimes hope just evaporates as is the case with me now. But I am just hanging in there , against the odds hoping that one fine day i would find my destined partner. Also, One has to brave the taunts of relatives of not getting married despite having the basic things such as good looks, good job and a respectable family background apart from the peer pressure of many friends getting married .

Over 200 profiles parsed , > 25 face to face meetings and still in the process of seeking ! :cry: :cry:

I just want to scream " Where the hell are you ?" :lol: :lol:

arpit
Posts: 9
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:50 pm

Re: Experiences of Meeting would be partners

Post by arpit » Thu Aug 16, 2018 8:53 am

seema wrote:
Wed Aug 15, 2018 1:18 pm

He : So before starting our conversation I will ask you a very clear question, do you have any boyfriend?
:roll: :roll: :roll:

Me : (I was shocked…I mean literally shocked…I was expecting he will ask me whether it is the right time to talk or not because I was literally busy that time and instead he was asking me this … urgggghhhhhh!!!…but okay I kept my calm and went to the separate room to talk) I am sorry, what kind of question is this?

He : No I just asked because I never had any girl friend. Though I am open minded person but I will prefer a girl who has no past. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

I was shocked again. I ended the conversation then by telling him that my career is very important for me. I will not be able to leave my job right now. I give my first preference to the family, so here I don't think that I will be doing justice with you.
It was hilarious experience :lol: :lol: and at the same time sad to see such cases :( :( . I tell you one thing. This guy must later be thinking that career oriented girls think too highly of themselves which is again funny... :lol: :lol:

But kudos to you for handling the situation and make a graceful exit

arpit
Posts: 9
Joined: Sat Aug 11, 2018 2:50 pm

Re: Experiences of Meeting would be partners

Post by arpit » Thu Aug 16, 2018 8:54 am

arpit wrote:
Thu Aug 16, 2018 8:53 am
seema wrote:
Wed Aug 15, 2018 1:18 pm

He : So before starting our conversation I will ask you a very clear question, do you have any boyfriend?
:roll: :roll: :roll:


Me : (I was shocked…I mean literally shocked…I was expecting he will ask me whether it is the right time to talk or not because I was literally busy that time and instead he was asking me this … urgggghhhhhh!!!…but okay I kept my calm and went to the separate room to talk) I am sorry, what kind of question is this?

He : No I just asked because I never had any girl friend. Though I am open minded person but I will prefer a girl who has no past. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


Story doesn't end here. He called me next day late night and he was drunk.
He : What is the problem with you. Why are you not interested in me?
:evil: :evil: :evil:


I was shocked again. I ended the conversation then by telling him that my career is very important for me. I will not be able to leave my job right now. I give my first preference to the family, so here I don't think that I will be doing justice with you.
It was hilarious experience :lol: :lol: and at the same time sad to see such cases :( :( . I tell you one thing. This guy must later be thinking that career oriented girls think too highly of themselves which is again funny... :lol: :lol:

But kudos to you for handling the situation and make a graceful exit

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